Sex In The Time Of COVID-19
Changes in Sexual Health Messaging to Reduce the Risk of Contracting the Novel Coronavirus During the Pandemic
By Maria Lopez-Bernstein
Turn off the lights. Lean in on your partner for a kiss to get the fire started, and wait – what’s this? A mask? What the?
Welcome to sex in the time of COVID-19.
Some people find discussions related to sexual health a bit uncomfortable, and the novel coronavirus has just made it a tad more difficult, but it’s important to talk about how to have safer sex since the very act of having sexual encounters may spread the virus.
We don’t know everything there is to know about COVID-19 yet, but we can work with what we do know to help reduce the risk of contracting the virus when we want to get sexually intimate.
What We Know
COVID-19 can be spread through respiratory droplets that are released when a person who has the virus coughs, sneezes, or talks. These droplets can be inhaled or land in the mouth or nose of a person nearby. So coming into contact with a person’s spit through kissing or other sexual activities could expose you to the virus. An infected person can also spread respiratory droplets onto their skin and personal belongings, so a sexual partner could get the virus by touching these surfaces and then touching their mouth, nose, or eyes.
While there is no evidence that COVID-19 can be spread through semen or vaginal fluids, it has been detected in semen and stool.
Since some people who have COVID-19 display no symptoms, it’s important to keep distance between yourself and others if the virus is spreading in your community. This includes avoiding sexual contact with anybody who doesn’t live with you. If you or your partner isn’t feeling well or think you might have been exposed to the virus, it’s best not to kiss or have sex with each other until you’re both feeling better. And if you or your partner are at a higher risk of serious illness with COVID-19 due to an existing chronic condition, you might want to skip sex altogether. While skipping sex may lead to frustration, there are remedies for this. Read on.
Making Sex Safer
You are your best sexual partner. What does this mean? This means that masturbation is a great option for those who want to ensure they don’t contract COVID through sexual means. Masturbation is 100% safe and can alleviate sexual frustration. Take this time to learn about your body and what makes you feel good. Be sure to wash your hands and any sex toys you may want to use, both before and after pleasuring yourself.
Adults might also consider engaging in sexual activity with consenting and trusted partners via text, photos, or videos, ideally using an encrypted platform to provide privacy protection. Minors should refrain from doing so as sending and viewing sexual material featuring minors is illegal – even if it’s minor-to-minor.
Be sexually active only with your partner who lives with you and who isn’t infected with COVID-19. This is easier said than done, I mean, how do we know if and when we become infected with the coronavirus? (Take a self-assessment.) Still, if you are living together, you are already sharing certain risks.
If you are going to be sexually active, especially with someone outside of your household, consider these precautions by Dr. William F. Marshall, III of the Mayo Clinic, to reduce your risk of getting COVID-19.
Minimize the number of sexual partners you have.
Avoid sex partners who have symptoms of COVID-19.
Avoid kissing - this may be very hard, because after all, kissing is part of the lovemaking, romance and how we show affection. But in the time of COVID-19, it’s how we pass the virus if someone is infected.
Avoid sexual behaviors that have a risk of fecal-oral transmission (rimming) or that involve semen or urine.
Use condoms and dental dams properly during vaginal, oral and anal sex - not just for COVID-19 prevention, but also for prevention of sexually transmitted infections - those bugs are still around, too!
Wear a mask during sexual activity – this can be fun!
Wash your hands and shower before and after sexual activity.
Wash sex toys before and after using them.
Use soap or alcohol wipes to clean the area where you have sexual activity.
Avoid face-to-face sexual positions where you can become exposed to respiratory droplets. Enjoy this time to experiment with other positions.
“Beyond sex, there are other ways to create or maintain intimacy with a partner at a distance”, says Dr. Marshall. “Go on virtual dates together, share the music you enjoy, write letters or poetry to one another or dress up for each other.” Hey, even Zoom a sexy dance. Take this moment to be as creative as possible. It can be a lot of fun.
COVID-19 has changed the sexual playing field, especially for those who don’t live together, but it doesn’t have to leave us completely frustrated and unfulfilled. It’s just a matter of shifting gears – for now.
Resources: Mayo Clinic, Planned Parenthood, American Sexual Health Association, HealthLine, CDC
